i have often thought of writing a great novel about a Muslim boy and ending it with following lines: “and when his hands touched the golden and blue cover of Quran, a chill passed through his body. he could not remember what happened next when he opened the first page and found it blank. the words had vanished as promised.”

i have not been able to be a Mo’min.I have not even tried. I have kept that for future. I am very idealistic about that. I have a feeling that after this career thing is done with, I will give appropriate time to religion and faith. when i pray, i ask Allah to get me through this period in time so i can focus on the real business. “how ironical! if not now, then never!” i hear a voice telling me. “why wait? is this a rule to make sure you get enough money to provide for yourself in future and then start considering what the requirements of Quran are? why don’t you ask Him to give you the strength to understand the Knowledge and help you pass through this phase too?”

as usual i ignore the voice and get out of the mosque and forget about it. ignorance is bliss.  i don’t know about others but I have assumed my faith to grow strong with time without any efforts being made. i have formed a view of myself being the perfect Muslim in future life.

a short story here is worth telling:

a man, very intelligent and smart commits a crime and is exiled from his country to another place. on the night of his arrival, he plans that he will make his period of exile as interesting as possible. he learns the trade of new place. copulates with local women. earns money. and dreams about returning to his homeland once  the exile ends.  at last the day comes. he goes back to his house in his own country and finds it gloomy and dark. the food tastes bad and women, worst. he loses his health to drugs and wealth to gambling.  and then he realizes that all he had thought was a mirage.”

i hope i haven’t seen a MIRAGE.

7 thoughts on “Mirage

  1. Well i pray for you and all of us to ALMIGHTY ALLAH that a day should come soon when we all become MOMIN.AMEEN

  2. This is mind blowing and beautiful. Isn’t it said somewhere that a time will come when the words of the Quran will vanish? Eerie. I feel the same. Once my university is over, I think I will have all the time to practice Faith more. Maybe just wanting that is a good thing and makes it a reality.

    • Yes it is said and i found it very haunting and it affected me. Just wanting it makes us ambitious, these are good intentions but you see that its lazy, its sloth, its waiting for the moment to reach you, its overconfidence in our abilities, its not proactive, put simply its inaction. This is an issue with all of us young people. We think we are young so we are bound err you know we think we cannot be ‘ideal’ but we are full ideals. Its an illusion and this is because we think have much to live.

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